Early Lent

I have weaknesses. One of them is spending too much money on clothing for myself and decorations for my home.

I like the concept of Lent, giving up something to become someone better.

After the excesses of the Christmas season, (did I mention that my dear husband really spoiled me?) I thought I'd start Lent early this year. Instead of waiting until Ash Wednesday (February 17th this year) to give something up, I decided that I would not purchase any clothing or home decor from Christmas until Easter. If you know me, you know this is a tough one! I honestly don't need a thing ~ I have enough clothes to probably last the rest of my life, and my home is completely decorated, in fact, some may say "over-decorated." And yet I do so enjoy shopping for these items.

Mostly, it has been a matter of training myself to not even go where I would be tempted. That means avoiding the clothing/home aisles at Walmart and Target, my favorite hangouts.

I succumbed in January. I went to the Provo Craft outlet, because it was next door to Simply Splendid where I went to get a birthday gift for my sister. I bought these two lovely topiaries with little blue pansies:

From the outside, don't they look great on either side of the gothic arch candle holder my sister gave me?

From the inside, see what I mean about the cluttery, over-decorator?

Well, I didn't feel too bad, since they were under $10 each. But still . . .

In February I had a couple of weak moments in Target and bought some clothing items. Once when I was by myself, but I had some Target gift cards from redeeming credit card points, so I rationalized that it was kind of like "extra money." (This goal really isn't about the money as much as me having self-control, so that really was a rationalization) And then again the next day when I was with Jenny. That night I was in bed reading, feeling really disappointed in myself. The clothes in my closet were mocking me, not making me happy. The book I was reading was "Weakness is Not Sin," by Wendy Ulrich, where she teaches that the remedy for weakness is humility (Ether 12:27) and the remedy for sin is repentance.

Now I'm not sure whether my purchasing of things I don't need is a weakness or a sin, probably both, ~ but I realized that I could repent by being humble and returning the clothing items I bought to the store. And so I did. And I felt free.

And now on to Easter with my integrity mostly intact and my resolve firm.